the text message: virtue or vice? is it a plague consuming our social intercourse or a modern convenience prompting better and fuller relationships? originally, when i first purchased a cellular communication device, i refused to communicate via textual means. even receiving a message annoyed me because of the 5 cent fee. i would return text messages with telephone calls.
then everything changed when i met peter shigeki. he thrived off textual communication. i soon realized the convenience and ease of use; however, was i sacrificing something more substantial to participate in the convenience of rapid and easy communique (communique acutally means 'an official announcment,' but i figured i would use it anyway)? did my cousin lead me down a path of less full relationships and eternal convenience, or did he open a new world of effective relationship building?
recently, i changed my cellular telephone plan to include unlimited text messages. what have i done? have i sold my soul and traded my birthright for a mess of porrage? paul: i know this doesn't interest you. this is not your scene. so, as an objective observer i'm sure your comments would be helpful. skinny, i don't care what you think about it.
also, i even question my use of this web log. is it indeed exhibitionism, as some claim? should i continue my use of this means of expression? i know not. but i do post random pictures that have nothing to do with the subject at hand. and i haven't done anything in preparation for school today. so...what does it all mean?
well, ma, i'm sorry this isn't like last post. but what can i do.
loves.
31 comments:
no comment (it'll count as a comment on your website, but it ain't).
skinny: i'm happy that you didn't comment because i don't care what you think.
stevey_
a comment made last night to be as we drove along the east side: there is an element of narcisism in all bloggers. and i have to agree. if not even minor exhibitionist, then what? if we didn't want people to read our stuff and think that we are provacative, why would we web-log? why not just keep a journal if its not for self-display.
skinny_
stephen does comment count. so keep that in mind with your non-comments
ok well i hackedinto steavens file of picters for my new post
I do lament my inability to 'work the phones'. I tried to get the '24' ring on my phone but there was some rttl something or other that was to be emailed to me and downloaded. I couldn't do it...
sad
As stephen said, i haven't received and sent more than 5 text messages in my lifetime. (I had never sent or received an email when I returned home from my mission)
Text messages. It was impressive to watch Petey work his game over the phone as we ambled down the streets in the lower east side of Manhattan (i'm trying to a new yorker, but my geography is probably off).
To give context and a decision on text messages I start with a story. I was engaged to Amy and immediately left to the philippines for a month. During that month of intense emailing I may have learned and shared with Amy as much as we had in our previous 8 months of dating. I believe this was because I was willing to share things with her that I may not have been comfortable saying face to face. I am also more articulate when i write.
So, from my experiment (n=1), if you don't sacrifice face to face time because of your textual messages then you are deepening your relationships through the written word. As I watched Peter work his game I think he was increasing his face time because of the ease of the real time messaging (rather than checking messages later).
This isn't fully valid because texting on a phone is abbreviated because of the small 'keyboard' and time it takes to write.
You may talk on the phone less, but if you have something really substantial to say you usually call anyway. In this way you are cutting out the usually drawn out, useless chatter that usually happens with informal quick phone calls.
paul: i think you might be right. textual intercourse is fast, convenient, and effective.
lafe: you better watch yourself.
petey: i don't think i like exhibitionism. should i stop?
stop asking people questions just to get more comments...
now petey: lets not get jealous.
do you ask questions?
petey: what are you doing tomorrow night?
I have engaged in this internal debate myself and have just succumbed to the convenience of modern technology. Texting is easy and convenient, especially when you are somewhere that you are unable to talk on the phone... like class or in a meeting. I agree with Paul in that sometimes email and texting can allow deeper communication so long as you continue with the face time.
Paul: I like your story. But Petey really only gets himself into trouble with his textual activity.
Stephen: I agree with petey in that you shouldn't ask more questions to get more comments. I didn't know this was a contest to get the most comments... quality... not quantity.
Stephen and Petey: blogging is not necessarily exhibitionism. I suppose there is an element of narcissistic behavior involved, but only if you are out there selling yourself and promoting your self-proclaimed greatness. What's the real reason behind your web logging?
nikki: i only wish i knew my motivations.
nikki: quality?
texting is stupid i've decided.
check out what the nytimes has to say:
This may be the universal attraction of text-messaging, in fact: it's a kind of avoidance mechanism that preserves the feeling of communication - the immediacy - without, for the most part, the burden of actual intimacy or substance. The great majority of text messages are of the "Hey, how are you, whassup?" variety, and they're sent sometimes when messenger and recipient are within speaking distance of each other - across classrooms, say, or from one row of a stadium to another. They're little electronic waves and nods that, just like real waves and nods, aren't meant to do much more than establish a connection - or disconnection, as the case may be - without getting into specifics.
to check out more go to http://www.nytimes.com/2006/01/22/magazine/22wwln_lead.html?emc=eta1
nikki_
don't hate just cause i am way more textually active than you...
stevey_
for real this isn't a comment contest. and if if were, you would lose cause you comment twice for everybody else's one...
don't act like its not true. just count 'em up on this post alone.
and i bet you're already thinking about how to comment to this comment, thus increasing your comment total.
2-fold: exhibitionism and comment counting. or should i call you lafe?
petey:
i
don't
this painful please stop
know
you
are
talking
about
comment champion...
stephen evans frandsen!!
um...you know what i mean
petey:
thing is, all stevey's out to do is manipulate. that's what this is all about, manipulation. so you's got to fight his comment counting and exhibitionism by not giving him what he wants. you can comment, just not like he wants you to.
stevey:
still no comment.
skinny: that's all i want from you. thank you.
Sooo… to break up the exhibitionism, I thought I’d add a post.
I, like Paul, am pretty inexperienced when it comes to text-messaging. I do, however, know quite a few texters…
It seems that texting definitely has a place and a purpose. One can be discreet when a phone call would be inappropriate. Long, unwanted phone conversations can be avoided. Yadda yadda.
But “textual relationships?” It reminds me of those boys in college that used flakey pick up lines and one liners. How long can you really go on doing that?? Can you really have substantial, meaningful text with someone—or is it all just fun and games with you texters??
And really, texting is just not set up for significant conversing. To have meaningful “conversations” would cause an early onset of arthritis in your thumbs.
So if a relationship is built around text, or if text is the major focus of the relationship… I would say it is shallow and superficial. Just like most of those college boys.
amy, does your husband still qualify as a college boy? he is still in college, right? as am i. as is peter.
but i think you are right. texts are tools with which you can set the grounds for more substantial relationships.
stay tuned for my 24 debriefing web log.
College vs. graduate school. And notice I said "those" college boys. Paul was not one of them. Lucky me.
yes. but he stinks.
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